TRANSPARENCY.
In the interest
of keeping the poetry community on the up & up, we offer this quick primer
on how we decide what to publish.
Although social watchdogs like foetry.com
and Jim Behrle have not
called us out yet, we want to nip in the bud any rumors of cronyism, nepotism,
favoritism.
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Submissions
arrive at Lungfull World Headquarters and are immediately buried in salt
mines for five years or until they are stable.
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Retrieved
from mine by runners & placed in pink semicicular envelopes for tracking.
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Sorted
by Density Bonus.
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Distributed
to editors via pneumatic system.
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Editors
wear Anti-Impropriety goggles that prevent them from making decisions
based on having inadventantly seen the poet's name or read his/her submission.
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After
mistakenly dismantling welfare in 1996, editors are now much more careful
to avoid making the manuscript a law.
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Editors
meet once a month in international waters to argue over the finalist
poems & dispose of bodies.
Before and after
the meetings, the internet is rife with chatter as the merits of each
submission are hashed out. Here's an
example of an exchange between two editors. The candidate's name
has been withheld, though it doesn't take a fucking genius to figure
out we are talking about you.
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Decisions
are based on complex algorithms & theoretical properties. We employ
the procedure used in Flowers for Algernon on ourselves to grapple with
the subtleties of our own poetics during the meeting. This is done at
the expense of our long-term well-being. It is sad, but necessary.
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Beacuse
rejecting friends can be difficult, editors wear green or red to indicate
their opinions. Winners of the wrestling match get rewritten & published
under different names in Fence & Lit.
The losers are forced
to appear in Lungfull. |
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The
very best submission gets burned to insure a good crop next year. That's
the only reason you were not published this time.
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LUNGFULL!magazine
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